Paradise is now burned,

I don’t care I’m not concerned.

It’s your fault but I should lie.

To my freedom must bid goodbye.

Why it’s me, who had to race

; Against the curse of the time.

We are too young to face this case

; Tastes sourer than a lime.

Let’s escape and runaway

; Against the laws and the rules.

There is a cost that you have to pay

But I won’t let them, I’ll have them fooled.

In this Chamber we were stocked

On such issues you lost your luck.

Behind the bars I saw something

We saw the night sky is enchanting.

On hardships we were left for dead

But we lived and move ahead.

We are too young to sacrifice

But I won’t let them make you pay the price.

They wanted us on separate ways.

On your memories give me a place.

Visit me if you have time

As I was paying your crime.

No direction

Half of my feet are on the grave
Having hard time to be brave
I’m earning nothing but air
Want to comeback to the snare

Nothing to look forward to
I’m starting lose courage too
Can’t escape from the bottom
Cos my brain is getting random


My Composure is clumsy
And I’m turning lazy
I don’t need your discipline
It won’t go though my skin

Will there be an improvement?
Still tired up to this moment
I wept in starvation
Of a higher motivation


But there’s still no direction
Five dozens of correction
Weary of being a retard
That panics inside the blizzard?


Crying out for help will never work
And I’m dead of the hardwork
Unimpressed of the outcome
So depressed about the sum



Where is the hope that you promised?
Is it a lie that I had kissed
My position is critical
This illness is getting fatal

Where had the rainbows been?

Fragrance has no more scent.

Endurance lost strenght.

I can't see no life form.

I'm crawling like a worm.

The Sprinkles of dust

and metals covered in rust.

Corpses in everyplace,

and a new unsolved case.

Catacombs are displayed.

wrong traits are now obeyed.

What is the use of deceptions?

We are divided in versions.

Againts my will I'm in a war.

Science gaved me such scar.

Fairwell to home and friends.

Is this how the story ends?

It's not what I dreamed of.

My knees are turning soft.

About what have occured.

I'm begging for help my lord.

Where had the rainbows been?

When will the clouds gets thin.

The storm is not stopping.

Torential downpours dropping.

Colors changing hue,

but there's still no clue.

about the next conclusion

after this invasion.

Vanished in just one step.

Promises never been kept.

Can anybody stop this now.

There should be hope...somehow.

Punished by a wrong step.

promises remained unkept.

Will someone give us help somehow.

We needed salvation now!

Aging

Here I am on this wheelchair
Sitting in complete despair
Accepted that I’m aging
As my health is fading

There you are in full comfort
Thanks to my concrete support
Enjoy lounging in luxury
While I’m in complete misery

In this sick retirement home
Within a lonely poem
The nurse pretending like she cares
But she is mechanical in the way she stares

The dawn have devoured the sun
All my life I don’t have fun
Passing all my knowledge for you
I had enough from saving you from the curfew

I’m useless now so you had left me
Disrespecting me like an enemy
How dare you abandoning me in the dark
While it is me who gave you your spark

Who fed you when you are hungry?
Who gave you drink when you are thirsty?
Who dressed you up when you are naked?
Who make rest when you felt jaded?


Who gathers firewood when you were shivering from the cold?
When your life is shapeless I gave you mold.
How could you leaving me because I’m invalid?
Remember how I helped you when you are feeling timid?

Abandoning me without looking back at all
The way you grin when I take the fall
Snubbing the one who put you in your current place
Makes the honor you have a disgrace

I swear you will grow old just like me
I can picture what you turn into.
Enjoy your meal of betrayal
Eat your meal of denial

Snake inside the plastic sack!
You will pay for not looking back!
We will share the same fate
Absorb it all until it’s too late

Next time it’s your turn
Tomorrow you will regret that you are born
Uselessness is an adjective that you will earn
Karma will crack up your big horn

Ode Number 0001

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-




Controlling my temper
The sequence is hyper
Confused about the pace
Counting the inner space.
Running from my old fears
The world I joined is fierce
Receiving the critiques
Rampage that can’t be fixed
You were there and I’m here
There are words you must hear
Youth that we never have
Yelling from a yellow pad.
Initials of our names
Together in the flames
Inside my only choice
I still hear your voice.
None of my predictions
Telling my convictions
Never been hurt this way
Never been in dismay.
Get out of my tired mind.
Thinking of you makes me blind.
Grinding the bits and pieces.
Gone by infinite mess.

Hedgehog

Alone Every night in the endless fright,
Black moths and Butterflies are on my sight.
Seized by darkness, fear and pain,
Up to the morning the nightmares just maintain.
No particular reason they just hate me.
Whatever I do is treason, they just avoid me.
I lost most fortitude to keep on standing.
They find me and my quills terrifying.
Entities are destroying my dreams and goals.
I’m not a cement to cover your holes.
The damage can’t be healed for I’m heedless.
They make me feel very useless.
If they want to laugh they will jeer at me.
This chaotic life has no clarity.
Ousted; when I spoke my own outcry,
Conflicts to move on make me die.
Alone, every day light with my self I fight.
Against wrong allegations I had lost my right.
I’m a Hedgehog who can’t be hug as you see.
All their trash is dedicated for me.
I was Alone in every morning and afternoons;
Strangled by squirrels, bunnies and raccoons
Misery is my twin, I have no friends.
A wallflower in the dead ends
Tagging me as a menacious freak
Concluding my existence with a leak
I’m drugging hard but no one cares.
I’m wretch and trapped on these snares.
Collapse the pain and shame please.
Demolish the walls around me please.
All the blame: Go away faraway from me.
Clear my name in jeopardy.
Hysterical, I have no one to depend
Is there a forest where I can blend?
I tried to be a good boy and I tried so hard
But rejection is my reward.
I’m alone…Alone
Into this cruel world
I’m alone… all alone…
This cruel world is blurred.
Alone…Alone…Wake me up if this thing is a dream.
Alone…Alone
If I could only scream

I wrote this during the darkest years of my life. It's all about having a hard time to fit in to a society. This about the pain of having no friends just because you are not good enough for them.

disapointed

Disappointed

I thought I’m the greatest
I thought I’m the strongest
I thought I’m not the weakest
I thought I’m the fittest
I thought I’m the most talented
I thought I’m the most gifted
I thought I’m well crafted
I thought I’m the most appreciated
I thought I will not fail
I thought I will prevail
I thought I will not trail
I thought I will hit the nail
I thought I can do very well
I thought I can fastly excel
I thought I can spell
I thought I can ring the bell
The Result is the opposite
Insults crashed me on a slit
Critiques dumped me on a pit
Inner bankruptcy crushed my conceit.
Lacerations deep inside
I almost committed suicide
The outcome is not what I expect along the ride
My I face, I want to hide.
I thought I have a happy ending
I thought I have a factor so interesting
I thought I have no reminiscing
I thought I have no descending
I thought I’m a star
I thought I’m a czar
I thought I’m a genius who will get very far
I thought I’m a skin with no scar
I thought all of my dreams will come true
I thought I already grew
I thought I already flew
I thought I already knew
I thought….I thought so…

Armadillo

Everything used to be so tenderly,
As you walk you’re vanishing slowly.
When will I see your great smile again?
Am I the source of all your pain?
Having you right here on my side,
Was a strange, really strange ride?
It’s not easy for me to say
You leave and you’re so far away.
Physically you’re present now,
Staring at me somehow,
But it hurts that I know
You wanted me to go.
Having you having distance from me:
It’s too hard because we used to be very close.
Goodbye and good luck I wont disagree.
Have fun on the life that you chose
The tree we used to climb up was chopped down.
Our old playground was now a dull ghost town.
Changes are not easy to take.
Way too tired and I cannot escape.
Can’t you see?
That it’s not easy for me?
But I don’t want to see you unhappy.
I will miss you the most and I’m so sorry.
I know you are suffering
Setting you free us the only right thing.
Rolling down unto the eerie hill,
Twisted spine and I’m gutless and ill.
If a riddance of me is what you need.
Continue your life and you may now proceed.
You are far from when I met you.
I will now let you go.
For now we are still together.
But you’re so cold and you’re heart is out there.
Just to give you a brand new fresh start.
I’ll give you the peace on your heart.

For your Happiness

Our nation’s government is now Democracy.
; Which means I have the right to make you like me?
Addicted to the spell of your necromancy:
Turned suicidal for you just dislike me.
Like a fool you pushed me down on a dirty floor.
I still played blind despite of the inconvenience.
Go on hurt me and I’ll ask for more.
Beet me down and you will still have my obedience.
You are my reason to live but you never liked me.
Rejected and ejected after my silly plea.
It’s alright, Slit my throat if that will make you feel right.
Stab me with a dagger and shoot me with bullets.
Tear me into pieces if that really make you feel jolly.
If you still can’t have enough hit my face with a machete…
On the flight of the creatures of the hating frostbite
I will make you like me! I will make you happy.
Don’t lie I know you wanted me to die.
Crash my bones and crack my head like a walnut.
Go on Kill me!! If that makes you happy!!
For your happiness I will make you want me.

Water Ambience

Water Ambience
What is the sound that I heard?
It makes me nervous like your there.
I can’t say any word,
Like the feelings I can’t share.
How come I can’t bare it all?
And I’m unable to call.
I have to be man enough,
to tell you later and laugh.
I handed you my Jacket
For the evening is so cold.
Put my hands on my pocket
And I kept everything untold.
What is it in you and I felt so shy?
While deep inside you make me fly.
I feel the spark you.
I hope you notice, I hope you knew.
Mixed emotion never fades
And I’m drowning in cascades.
What is this confusion?
Am I in dilution?
Visions of a bright view,
Walking on the seashore next to you,
When can I say what I feel for you?
Why I’m only a friend for you.

It sucks

NO I NEVER DREAMED TO DO IT
NOR ON MY SEAT THINKING ABOUT IT
EVENTHOUGH I HAVE DONE IT
HONESTLY I’M REGRETTING IT
NO I NEVER LIKED TO DO IT
BUT I’M FAR WEEK TO HOLD AGAINTS IT.
WASHING MY HANDS IN THE FAUCET TO REMOVE IT
IF THERE IS ONLY AWAY TO PREVENT IT
WHAT’S THE BEST WAY TO AVOID IT
MY BONES ARE SHAKING TO STAND IT
DIFFICULT TO GET USED WITHOUT IT
IF THERES A CURE LET ME FIND IT
SUDDENLY I FOUND MY SELF PRACTICING IT
WANT TO GET AWAY FROM IT
NEED A VACCINE AGAINTS IT
OR REHAB AGAINTS IT
TIGHT BONDINGS ARE NOW SPLITTED AND IT’S BECAUSE OF IT
WANT TO GET AWAY FROM IT
I DO REALLY REGRET DOING IT
I HATE IT, OH DAMN IT.
I WISH I CAN ESCAPE FROM IT
I WISH CANT GETAWAY FROM IT.
NO I NEED IT AND I WANT IT.
NO I MUST BE OUT OF IT.

Crow

Crow

Been an assassin born to kill born in stealth, Dark past I tried to hide and I have no guilt.
Revelations started to tear and I have to swear that I have washed my hands but the smell of blood is not gone. It’s better to avoid me, for the man and who is the man I used to be.
I thought you will avoid me but you swayed me away from the wrong path.
After I stole your only happiness then it leaved you in mournfulness.
You managed to forgive me while you can deceive me for I have no right to stay alive!
All I have done is pure awfulness, my persona is cold hearted and emotionless.
But you get to wake me while you can now kill me and you know I have no right to stay alive.
On you respond you said “no one is born evil” then I replied, “Yesterday wont hide any seal” Opportunities for revenge was now all yours but you open your golden doors.
Why you didn’t avoid me and I have told you what man and what kind of man I used to be. Why don’t you just do your revenge on me because now my conscience is killing me now! Now I’m ashamed more than before! I’m the one who stole your only happiness then it leaved you in sourness.
You should not have forgiven me while you can deceive me for I have no right to stay alive! All I have done is pure awfulness, my persona is cold hearted and emotionless.
But you get to wake me while you can now kill me and you know I have no right to stay alive.
--------------
Writer's note:
It's about people who had stolen something they can't return...

Torrid Urge

Torrid Urge
Over scratching my skin
For the itch is now within.
Yes I have an empty head
Stitching barbwires as a thread.
I admit that I have fun
From the sins I have done.
Now my innocence was drilled.
Something I don’t know was grilled.
I can’t help my torrid urge, pleasure and heat is now merged.
The flame is hard to extinguish as morality’s relinquished.
So much tired to fall and crawl and there should be self-control.
The price to pay is expensive and the impact is negative.
Craved to reveal a secret
And now bruised to regret.
Constrained to do what’s wrong?
It’s tantalizingly strong!
Every action has a fruit
And the payment will start to recruit.
Sour grapes do not mean life.
Dead-end, as I’m overripe
Curious to experiment
About the mysterious movements
Satisfaction on the bliss
Moaning across the axis.
I’m ashamed I want to run from all the things I have done.
Chastity has no more shield and no doctor can get he healed.
I’m murdered by my own urge
Defrayments have emerge
Debts had double its impact.
Right through the rude payback
My neck is now on the chopping board
Below a rusted sword
My health is now a slave
I should have stopped what I craved.

To Tear apart

Madness about my surrounding’s texture. I’m nailed to my angry handicapture.
Hunger for acceptance and attention leads me to immoral convention.
In every angle I’m not healthy. My hopes and wishes had no guarantee.
Useless abnormal dimwit is the phrase they use to dump me on the exit.
Repelled to the route I can’t reach. Starving soul is inside the dark ditch.
Where is the reality where I belong? To get there I’ve been patient to wait for long.
Enough! My chest is about to explode. My lungs can’t breathe and I’m about to overload.
Let me scream what I feel to make me feel free. No more bothering give silence to me.
I swear to God you can’t tear me apart. I can prove something you awful human fart.
No more scolding and feet stepping.
You cant object because I’m correct.

Those Humans are emitting Flames (poetry)

Until now I’m shocked on what I have witnessed.
A necromantic force campaigning spell and now I’m hexed.
Whirling around the consciousness of every brain
Faded by the sound of foolishness that flows on every vein
Run! Those humans are emitting flames,
So indeed powerful I can’t mention names.
Pulsating! The pressure is higher than normal.
Paranormal is now beyond the primal
By it’s self the whole realm can burn down.
From the biggest continent down to the smallest town
Grilling the life forms of all kinds of species,
Praying for a step for me to handle this,
Hide! Those people are capable to emit flames.
I’m deadly serious; they’re not playing children’s games.
Beware! If you don’t want to turn yourself into ashes
Don’t ever look back or you’ll see gory images.
Devastating
Heart pounding
Frightening
Blurring
Igniting
A Spontaneous combustion
Slicing
Down the
Charcoals
Of my function
Panic! They know how to emit flames.
Forget about our wants. Escape their deadly aim.
Oh no! You could be one of their subordinates.
I can’t trust you; I won’t step on your slates.
Help me! Those monsters know how to emit flames.
They know how to breathe fire; it’s one of their favorite games.
Go away! Before it is too late!Invincible powers existed because of hate.

-----------
Writer's Note:
Living in a country with a messed up politics, I had seen chaos in a regular basis.